Oli’s admiration was undeniable. His big bro had wound up and ran into the giant puddle: water everywhere. I didn’t even see it, just heard the clap of the splash. I couldn’t take my eyes off Oli – laughter, joy and glee were painted all over his face, delighted in what his brother had just done.
My favorite thing to hear from the other room: “Yea Oli!!” I peak around the corner, watching Bronson teach Oli how to hit a ball, shred some couch-pow with his toy boarder or groove to the record-playing tune. Bronson’s not doing anything himself, for himself. He’s coaching, teaching, sharing and is enamored by Oli’s success.
I’m often haunted by comparison. That feeling of envy when I hear what others have accomplished or are accomplishing. That jealously. That I’m not enough – too insignificant, too ordinary. That what I’m living into right now – this being a mom and wife – might be all I’m really meant to accomplish. That lump in my throat forms, and that question lurks – am I willing to be this insignificant?
“He must become greater; I must become less.”
I’ve always thought this would mean that if I lived into my humble, present state God would be honored, and then, increase my state. I’ve always wanted to wear humility like a coat, never really changing at the core, wearing it until the day that it’s removed. God certainly wouldn’t call me to smallness forever.
Or would he.
Either way, I’ve got a lot to learn in this state, a long way to go in cheering on others. I want to be like my kids – laughing, cheering, coaching, enamored by the hard-earned accomplishments of others. I want to stand next to their success and be delighted, not slighted, not confused, not jealous, not bitter, not questioning, not self-seeking, not self-centered. I want to get lost in the glow of their joy, their shining moments, content to just share in it.
I want a smile on my face, a cheer on my lips, and my own claps ringing in my ears.
Share in the comments someone/something you admire!